No not house again I’ve done that enough for the next 10 years at least.
No this blog is moving, after being with WordPress for the past 12 months I’m not overly impressed and my beloved blogger is calling me back.
You will still find me at neverfoundtheplot but instead it will be http://www.neverfoundtheplot.blogspot.com
Thank for following and I hope you carry on with me!
I’ve been in a fog the past couple of weeks, I think post Christmas gets most people. I have got other dangerous things going on in that old mind of mine, however all in all it’s that time of year where things can just easily get on top of me and make me feel like I can not cope.
In doing my morning routine of getting up, feeding various children, packing the hubster off to work and sending the boys upstairs to brush teeth etc, I get 10 minutes to check emails, Facebook, twitter and the like. This morning on Facebook there was the usual chit chat on the time line, a long with a load of rubbish that I normally flick straight past. Then this one youtube video caught my eye. It was a person who doesn’t normally put up videos, and people had been commenting on it, so I thought it mustn’t be a virus like they have been known to be.
I click, I watched, I cried.
This man, this awe inspiring man just saw life in the correct way. And yes I do believe there is a correct way to view life and I don’t have proof to back it up, it’s just the correct way, which is having a positive outlook on life regardless of what it is life throws at you.
I leave the video with you to watch. Please tell me what you think of it and him as I just feel this amazing man needs to publicity.
I have just been looking through some fandabbydosy pictures of a friend of mine at their friend’s civil partnership ceremony (long winded sorry about that)
It dawned on as I drooled over her lush looking shoes that as a woman at a male civil partnership ceremony you can go all out, and dress over of this world amazing without having to take a seconds thought of showing up the bride!
For so long I have gone through life feeling as if I was firmly in the driving seat! I have taken a glance in the rear view mirror and it has become apparent I am a back seat driver!
I am coming to terms with something in my life! I have completely gone off the rails and lost my way once more. People tell me I’m looking fab and haven’t you lost so much weight!
This is not what I see when I look in the mirror or try on clothes, half my wardrobe still fits me, in fact I decorated the hallway last weekend , so lots of movement in a pair of trousers I wore before I supposedly lost all this weight everyone keeps going on about, yet they didn’t fall down!
So basically I would love to look through your eyes and see what you see, I would love to see that I am slim to you, because that is not what I see, I feel someone who tries ever so hard but is still repulsive. I see someone who lives on the edge wondering when it is that my husband actually realises he is completely out my league and leave me.
I want to be able to enjoy food again, for the guilt feeling when I eat to go. I want to not see the feeling of hunger to be a sign of weakness. I want to stop crying and enjoy a meal with my boys, where they either don’t pull a face because Mummy’s home cooked food has disappeared or ask me, “But Mummy, why aren’t you eating them same as us”.
But most of all I don’t want my baby boy to feel he needs to hide food in his room and eat them in the middle of the night because he doesn’t want mummy to be upset!